ESSE

My heart my body ,pains pleasures ,

giving and taking love.

Words ,how they untangle... sweetly undoing me.

My thoughts,desires, ,emotions distilled ,concentrated...
creating the perfume of my soul

* the old keys above are from one my boutiques , a very special place *

Dreams and Insomnia....

For a woman who rarely Enters the bed before 2am +, I certainly do allot of dreaming .

Capturing the dreams is not an easy task but they do serve as an inspirational platform .

I dreamt one night a few weeks ago ,I went to stay in a Hotel ,the suite had a Golden Buddha, silk sheets , a patchwork type silky duvet, a burnished wall treatment of pewter, rich dark furnishings, there was art on the walls ,I can't recall what but it was so different than my space it was darker , enclosed and I felt it was so intimate.I know my home is a very intimate space but this was different.I have no Idea where this stuff comes from exactly so vivid too but I do know that I wish I could take pictures of this place. It felt so warm and safe, and the bathroom was this tiny but luxuriously decorated shower room with the most decadent smelling shampoo.... In my dream I took a shower washed my hair and then I awoke .

what is the meaning of this dream ??? It is beyond me maybe just exploring new places and things.

Although I can not take pictures of this place I have been thinking of painting it abstractly. I have not painted in a while maybe it is time .....

just photos...

Naughty Me......

I have got the shopping bug right now , although I have a Christmas list to follow well actually several SHA - GRINN.

(not like Grinch just a self control compass)

My wicked girlish shopping self has been rearing it's naughtiness lately. That gave me an Idea for a photo essay..... I will have to capture some bits and pieces ,frivolousness if you will ...... I think I will call it what girls want ......

To be continued........

Humanity,Humbleness, Helping ......

In sharp contrast to the above I would like to mention that these frivolous moments are rare for me. After being on this earth 35 years a little fun will go a long way . I am happy to have the blessings I do .I have had very little and plenty at different times in my life . I know hunger,needing but not starvation,desperation and we should all be as helpful and conscious as possible to those in need. Spare them some dignity help people help themselves and I always , always share food ,above all else you will never starve if you give someone half a sandwich and you will not be cold if you spare a few items from your winter closet....... you will both have some. The feeling in your heart will far out way any sense of loss over any said item or extra bite.... Peace.

GRRRRRRR.........gotta vent damn it

<

UHHHHHHHHHH

After many hours spent, $$$$$ spent on a recent promotion .

Today innocently at 4 pm had the phone company add some new services to my business line and about a half hour ago 9 pm and much silence....... I figured out my line that was forwarded to my cell was in actuality accidently disconnected instead............no wonder it did not ring this eve not even once........weird anyways they may not have the "mistake " fixed untill Monday .........................

.....<<<<>>>> DAMN !DAMN !DAMN!

I had to have a small temper tantrum :(

Now I'll go back to being an adult with a little more class.......

Dreams Bijoux

Words thoughts...

crouching down.

Flashes dreaming...

whispers needing .

Feeding Dreams Bijoux

update .........

A quick update

the floors are being sealed a second time but here is the finished look.

Click the image to expand it.......

The Studio IS almost there...

I am so happy........ for the very first time , I created some floral designs in my new studio....The space is still being renovated and we were actually working on the floors that day .

I am really pleased with the space .........I can't wait to have the floors finished ,the rest of the trim done and the crowns installed .......

the gift of ..........

Music..... Last night I attended the Police concert@ ACC it was a fabulous show.....
I was so reminded of my Father.
I grooved and sang and remembered...

Music....

A constant companion , Inspiration......through good times and bad it is all around us it makes us laugh, cry, sing , dance be romantic and even express anger....... beautiful and magical it enhances sensuality and life in general.....

I want to thank my Beloved Father whom is a wonderful person that taught us about appreciating so many of life's gifts........ creativity , individuality , imagination , expression .........he taught and still teaches us the profoundness of sound, thought , feeling and expression/creation..... whether that creation is in nature,our own or Someone Else's ....he is an amazing Father and Grandfather....

Thanks Dad for giving us all the chance to enjoy all of these gifts
(ours & others) and appreciate them........

bathe.......

laying still....
wet steam rising ,breathing...
perfume scents air.
bubbles caressing ,
candles burn there.
Bathing away anger,ill ,setting me free
my mind contemplates,my soul eliminates,
my body celebrates me...

new photos .......

Today was take your kids to work day so I brought my 17 year old daughter around with me to the wholesale florist and a few other suppliers as you can see it was not all serious business......................... oh and I really am hoping to get through tonight it's day 5 with no cigarettes and I'm feeling a little spicy.................

dancing the night away.........

I am an adult no denying it....and let me tell you I am happy to be one........but you know youth has it's perks too. Endless energy.........

My sister and I went out dancing at The Century Room a couple of weeks ago... http://www.centuryroom.com/ for the third anniversary ( congratulations guys) and
David Waxman (dj) was here from NYC........he had us grooving all night long it was great......It was strictly for fun no work ,no event planning ,just letting go for a few precious hours.....I enjoyed a few G & T's my sister's company and a serious workout ........ I can't wait to do it again soon........

everything......

This is a piece that I have recorded,intend to mix....it is in the very beginning stages anyways here it is in text...........

This certainly will not make any sense to alot of people but none the less I like the way it turned out..............................

original shine scribble rings......respect why ..reaching....

birth peace finally help,harmony true, jump ,take birth.....

aches feelings.... despise go classical ugly...pleasure.....ground.....spirit.....

imagine ....realizations ,classical changed,

a tale of woe, fantasy , narrated life...... underground strings ...

beginning nothing.... crawling ....survival ...........everything..............

Back Story .........Guillian Barre Syndrome

I guess a little back story would be appropriate here .

I am the mother of three & I am by trade a floral and interior designer....... I owned and operated a retail boutique for 7 years ..... however it was time for a hiatus, a change ......we were becoming burnt out ,creativity was taking a backseat and personal time???.........plus...

My beloved father became ill .....and needed bypass surgery.
During his recovery at our home............ my eldest child 17 at the time ,my darling boy became very sick.
At first it was a mystery what was wrong he slowly( over a period of 6 wks) deteriorated eventually unable to walk ,undo buttons ,swallow food without choking etc...
We knew it was a neurological disorder .........so long story short minus the bullshit( there was allot his status as a child/adult prevented timely(er )treatment) he was treated for chronic as in not acute Gillian Barre Syndrome . Well Anytime I mention this syndrome to anyone they look at me like what the hell is that? Precisely why I wanted to mention it.
He has since recovered it was frightening and frustrating that brings us to now ........

We were very fortunate that A) he was young and strong ( he has always been health conscious and worked out everyday) and B) that the immunoglobulin therapy worked in combination with occupational and physical therapy .

The whole back story is to shed light on this RARE and unknown disease called Gillian Barre Syndrome please if you are curious go to the link below for more information. If you or someone you know?of has been touched by this syndrome and you want to share please leave a comment or e-mail me @ fleursbliss@gmail.com and with permission I will post your story too.

http://www.ninds.nih.gov/disorders/gbs/gbs.htm

Let Go

You, she thought of you the other day...

her, it made her cry.

like rain falling softly the tears streamed down and down,

staining the very pages she writes on.... to comfort herself.

The gift of emptiness you left her... them...

The days they'll never have ,the memories you cling to...

Six years since you packed up your

life into a box of disillusionment and walked away.

You keep coming back, giving birth to pain

let go now, she's letting go...........

Apres-boo

The witching hours have passed uneventfully (no drama)it was a good evening !I did not end up alone a decided to make the most of it! My love came home and stayed with me...........The Bebe's were all out after 6:30 .

I dressed chi and I even got dressed as a pirate and went out and got some Better junk for the kids.....if there is such a thing .........I am still nursing a headache from indulging in the sweets too.........I hardly ever have sugary things anymore.........I guess that's why .When I can I will upload a few photos........